The Proposal-3

Both of them reached the cafeteria of the college..where the rest of the gang and Riya..were busy discussing vacation plans...the moment they stepped in, all eyes turned..everybody was stunned to see Sameer..but everybody except Riya knew the reason behind this sudden makeover..and as expected Riya who was both surprised and shocked.. screamed out loud.."whats wrong with you???first the phone call and now this??"..."I'm sure something is fishy...what is it????"..."ahmmm...na..I'm mean nothing...just like that...actually..."..he tried hard but couldn't get himself to say it..."what??wait you sit...I will get you something to drink...and then tell me what's going on.."she got up and headed towards the counter..Sameer heaved a sigh of relief"whewww...its difficult guys..."he said to all his friends..just then one of them said"Listen dude...its now or never...just say it the moment she comes back..we are all there with you...don't get nervous..".. As Riya returned with a can of juice..she saw..Sameer kneeling down..and all eyes on her full of expectations..she got confused..n said,"Now what guys????"...breaking the silence..with his eyes closed Sameer finally said.."Riya..its been five long years since we've been friends,we've faught,we've cried,we've laughed together,I know I am an idiot..and maybe nowhere close to the perfect man of your dreams...but I promise you one thing I will always keep you happy because tears in your eyes make my heart ache..I can't imagine myself without you..I don't know when and how this happened...but I realised it the day I saw u dancing with somebody else on the prom nite...I couldn't take it...it was like seeing my world in somebody Else's arms..I couldn't sleep for days together..was fighting with myself day and night to figure out..what was wrong with me..why am I feeling bad if my friend is getting close to someone...but now I know..I know its was my love for you...I don't know when you became more than a friend to me...but now life seems to be incomplete without you...when you are not around I miss you..my happiness loses its meaning when i don't share it with you..my pain becomes double when I know you are not beside me to comfort me...I Hate that deficit.. I want to be with u always..and promise to love you as long as my life permits..so ma'am[extends his hand towards her....with his eyes still closed]...can I have the pleasure of your company forever??"
Riya...was speechless...she stood there motionless for two minutes..Sameer opened his eyes and smiled at her..but his smile disappeared in a second when he saw tears running down her cheeks...He got up...took a step forward towards her..there eyes met..Riya..wanted to say something..but was over powered by emotions..n as Sameer came one more step close to her...she just ran out of the cafeteria.. everybody was confused...they were all looking at Sameer..and started moving out following Riya..But Sameer stopped everybody...and ran out himself ...to see what the matter was... He looked for her here and there and at last found her sitting on a bench under the shade of a tree...with her head down..and with tears flowing out of her eyes...he went up to her and said..."there u are...cross country runner...[smiles..but realises soon that it was not the time to be funny]..."...she was still looking down...and did not speak a word.. Sameer...went down on his knees again...wiped off her tears ...took her hand in his and said...

[p.s:..firstly thank u soooooo muchhh friends for appreciating my work and being so supportive,encouraging and patient with me..this is the first time..I'm writing fiction..n i think by now seeing the length of the comments i post on ur blogs..u must have inferred that i really get carried away once i get down to write..sooo sorrryyyy for stretching this one so badly..n thank u soooo for being so patient...will definitely try to wrap it up next time...till then...to be continued:p......n i don't mind being beaten up...u can drop a few slaps along with ur comments if u want to.. thank u sooooooooo much once again...all u guys are amazing...god bless]

The Proposal-2

The words of the lady motivated him..he got the boost he was looking for..not that he was confident of a "yes"..but he knew that he just had to say it to her today...come what may..immediately all doubt left him..and a smile flashed on his face..he got up enthusiastically..kissed the wrinkled hand of the lady and said.."thank u soooo much for being my guiding light and showing me the way when i was all lost..can u do me a favor..i want to meet u tomorrow morning here again..coz whatever happens today...i will need u 2morrow...if its a yes then u will be the first person 2 i want 2 share this special news with n if its no...guess i will need more of your wisdom n a stronger dose of encouragement...so will u please...???....
"off course son...i will..don't worry...my blessings are with u..I'm going to the church right now...will pray for you..n remember one thing don't go to her with any preconceived notions..whatever u say ,say it from Ur heart.."..he nodded in a pleasing manner..and ran back home...
Quickly he took a shower...came out..opened his closet..and there he went again.."what do i wear??" he picked out a green t-shirt with a rock band printed on it..and a pair of cargo pants.."noo...she wont like it..she hates such clothes..hmmm...then what..this blue one???naa...".."ufff...""yess!!!i know what will she like...simple and boring that she is...a blue pair of jeans n a white shirt.."..."god..love actually makes u do crazy things..if i wear that..everyone will think I've come for an interview..that's not my look...for her i will have to transform from a dude to a dud...gosh..."
"but that's how she has always imagined the boy of her dreams to be dressed..".."i can do that for her.."...he quickly called his friend and asked him to arrange for a white shirt...just then he noticed that he had not shaved his face..and was reminded..how Riya use to keep telling him to do that but he did it at his own leisure once in a week..and then in order to irritate her more he use to rub his cheeks against hers...n she is used to go"eeeeeeeew.."n run...he went into the washroom to shave his face and while shaving he was constantly smiling in front of the mirror...and was thinking how the girl he used to fight with day and night..irritate or play pranks on..became the love of his life..."life seems perfect when i have her around"..just then his cell phone rang...it was Riya...his heartbeat increased..taking a short deep breath in n out he picked up the phone.."idiot...where are you..????at least one day you could have got up early...you know i have to leave tomorrow..and we were all suppose to go out today...everybody is here in college...except u..u just come here..i will show u..."..she said..."I'm sorry yar...i will just be there"..he said in a subtle manner n disconnected the call...
Riya got the shock of her life.."sorry??????and him...i guess i called up the wrong person...ufff..."
Just then his friend Rahul came with the white shirt...he quickly went n changed..n came out...Rahul was amazed.."you know Sameer...U've never looked so good...Riya will be surprised for sure"..."I just hope she is surprised man...n not shocked...".."It will go fine yar don't worry...chal lets rush..we are already late...else forget the proposal...she will eat you for breakfast..."both of them have a laugh...and leave for college!

[to be continued]

The Proposal-1

IT was 4.15 a:m...n the guy who would usually be snoring till 8.45 even though his class would be at 9...everyday...was wide awake...turning sides on the bed..so restless so confused..."what will she think?" "it will be so awkward...what if she never speaks to me after that?.." "naa...I can't do this.." "but how can I let her go without telling her what I feel..."god...she is an idiot...she should have known it...I mean why do girls need to be told everything... why can't they understand...somethings on their own..".."I'm not saying it...let it be..".."I have to...".."well maybe i should write down..."...he ripped the centre page of his notebook...n began writing...Dearest Riya.."dearest??whats wrong with me...how can i call her that...naa....[striked it with a pen]...Riya...[hmm that's better]..he thought to himself...listen i want to tell u that i think i like u...i don't know y...its stupid...but.."but????why??"...this sounds bad...can't write it...forget it...he crumpled that paper in his hand and started walking from one corner of his room to the other...finally ..he threw himself on the bed..n said to himself.."i don't think I'm prepared..to say anything to her right now..but if i don't i will have to wait for another month..as she will be gone fr a month to her granny's place for vaccations.." "gosh...what do i do?..." "I'm sure ma'am must be sleeping a sound sleep..n here I'm going mad coz of her....".."what do I do...?till yesterday I could have opened my mouth..and said whatever i felt like..and now its all so difficult all of a sudden.."..while he was still trying to figure out what to do..the clock struck 6..the first rays of the sun..peeped into his room..he knew he won't be able to sleep anyhow...and was feeling uneasy within those four walls of his room...with the idea of refreshing himself he decided to go out for a walk... after a stroll across the park..he sat down on a bench..
and began saying his thoughts aloud.."this is the first time I'm going so crazy over something..i was never like that...?y??maybe i know...its coz before this whenever I had a problem I had Riya by my side to set things right...she used to absorb all my tensions and return my smile...and today when its about her... have nobody to turn to for help.....I feel so lost without her..."..sighs.."why am i complicating things...everything was so simple earlier...".."should I risk my friendship with her..for my heart's sake..???"..he covered his face with both his hands...n sat motion less for a while... Just then an old lady...who was sitting exactly behind him on the other bench..came and sat next to him..putting her hand on his shoulder she said,"I'm sorry i just overheard the conversation u were having with yourself... I don't know if i should be interfering...but seeing u so troubled...n confused..i just couldn't stop myself...do u think you would like to talk?".. "I don't know"..he said in an agitated manner..."u don't know????know what?that u want to talk about it or not???or that u should tell her that u love her??"..he stared at the lady for 2 minutes..n said"how easily u said it...wish it was that easy...I don't even know if I should be doing it..at all...."..a sudden smile appeared on the lady's face..n she said"what are you scared of...a NO??..".."nooo...its not that...but what if I lose her friendship as well..it will never be the same again.."...he quickly responded...becoming more soft in her tone she said "u thought of it this way..but did u ever think that if u won't say it..you lose the chance of making her stay in your life forever..one day without her and u r miserable..do you want to remain that ways forever..i know things might get awkward..if it doesn't function the way you expect it to..but then she is Ur friend she will understand..n I know u will make it easy for her...but if u don't say it u lose the battle before fighting it...don't let that happen son..go tell her.."

[to be continued]

When we listen to it..why doesn't it listen to us?

It loves whom it wants to...
never seeks permission from u..
It makes pain a paying guest
and makes you forget the rest..
It locks up its favourite memory
and never gives us the key
It fills its rooms with ache
forces you to walk around with a smile that's fake
It rules our lives n plays the most important part
Yes you made the right guess..I'm talking about our heart
It makes most of us its bonded slaves
n shows us hell when it begins to crave
It makes us weak..it makes us cry
still people say listen to it.. I don't know why?


p.s:I myself think that you should follow your heart..its painful...but it leaves u with less regrets..heart ache is inevitable at times...but then pain makes you feel alive..these lines are just to highlight the dilemma of people who listen to their heart..n lose control over it...even at times when they shouldn't...when their soft side takes over them and they invite pain themselves..and feel shattered and helpless!

Sorry....feel it..say it...mean it!

"SORRY"...a five letter word that we all commonly use to express our repentance over a mistake...its a simple way of conveying our disappointment n sorrow over something wrong that we did...then whether its for pushing somebody in a crowded bus...for displacing anger on someone unnecessarily..or..for making somebody wait..what i just mentioned were a few incidences from our day to day life...may sound trivial but are more than enough to ruin some body's day and can have several other repercussions depending on the situation...but then you just possibly cant avoid it or help it at times...after all nobody is perfect and sadly neither life is..so then this small word...spoken in a gentle manner enables us to provide a little comfort to the person we offended..and at the same time exhibits our sense of realisation...but is it all that easy and simple always?...NO!.because a 'sorry' is easily acceptable when you break a vase at some body's place...but is the same 'sorry'..that acceptable...when we break some body's trust??we hurt some body's arm while getting onto a train...say sorry n get away with it...but if we hurt some body's feelings...n say a 'sorry'...is that enough????
I'm not saying that realising your mistake,being apologetic n saying sorry is wrong...in fact I feel it takes a lot of courage and strength of character to admit that you are wrong...and to ask for forgiveness...and not everybody can do it either...but some people have started using this word to their advantage...as a license to do anything n get away with it by saying "sorry"...they utter this word..without any genuineness and go ahead and create replicas of their past mistakes..
Sorry means we regret what happened or what we did...we all make mistakes ..its ok...nor can we assure someone of a perfect behaviour in future...but the least we can do is learn from our mistakes...n try not to repeat them ...only then an apology...a 'sorry' is worthwhile...so if u make mistakes at least make new ones...[hang on I have no intention of conveying that do it...coz variety is the spice of life...]...its just that when people cease to learn from their mistakes... they start getting numb to whatever happens around them...to the extent that they become insensitive towards the pain and suffering of others...
and when somebody attains that level..then his/her soul dies..only the body lives...
A heartfelt apology is like a painkiller...it may not help us recover the wound...but it definitely gives relief..!There are so many times we all falter in life but its not in our hands to undo things always..we possibly can't turn back time..we can't eat our words..we can't possibly change the way we made someone feel at some point or the other...and when we can't rectify..we can at least pacify..and allow words to soothe and heal!
so..

when u know u r wrong
don't let your ego hold on
allow Ur conscience to speak
don't think Ur weak
walk that extra mile
to return some body's smile
an apology won't make u small
its a weapon of the strong after all
don't u worry.. it won't go in vain
in fact it will convey that u feel other's pain
so if u realise
don't take time to apologise!


FEEL IT?SAY IT....MEAN IT!

Awwww B@byyyy.....

Angelic eyes that reflect innocence..cute,red plump cheeks..that everyone wants to pull..a smile that can make u forget all your sorrows in a second..that's the aura of a child...a baby...
this little soul..is so pure...so beautiful...untouched by hatred,unaware of the bitter realities of life and ignorant of the world of superficiality,selfishness n shallowness...
you know why children r special...n why do we say that god resides in the heart of a child...because that's the only place where love and peace exists..it has no place for anger,jealousy,prejudices or for that matter any such element that takes man away from man...and its this inner beauty that makes every child so beautiful and adorable..
Hold a little baby in your arms...n u will never want to put it down...see him balancing his little body on his tiny legs taking those first few steps...n it will sweep u off your feet..a tear in his eyes...and pain in your heart...his naughty smile n a delightful chuckle...makes u think life is perfect..the way his little fingers reaches out fr your hand...the way he clings on to you for support n u feel like sheltering him and giving him the world's security...that's the bliss u experience...when u have these little angels of God around...
I don't know ...i just love babies...n completely adore them...they have the ability to arrest my attention in a crowd of hundred...i feel like holding them,playing with them...or can spend hours together just observing them when they are all happy n merry in their own little world...and then typically i end up saying..."awwwww...choooo chweeeeett...."...which i know is a very common expression...especially amongst people who are fascinated by kids...but then that's how it is...

I know this writeup doesn't make much sense..sorry for that...its just that i met a really cute...baby two days back...and was constantly remembering him so that's what made me write this...
So I will end it write here with a very sweet quote that i had read somewhere, it said-"A baby makes love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bankroll smaller, home happier, clothes shabbier, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for!!"
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From dusk to dawn....

It was 5.45 p:m...it appeared as the evening sky was painted in shades of pink,yellow,orange and violet by the strokes of a paint brush...a cool breeze was blowing..flowers were closing their petals...the daylight was getting dim.. ..it was nature's way of bidding a daily farewell to the sun...yesssss....it was the time for the sun to set...
I opened the door of my balcony...sat on the chair outside...n gazed at the sky..it was all so beautiful,radiant,bright yet cool...slowly n slowly the sun was descending...it was as if with each minute it was moving one more step close to darkness..I have often heard people saying that on should never look at the setting sun..for some its a bad omen,others consider it unlucky...and a few others think it signifies the end of something....I was just wondering why do people have to connect something so beautiful...to a misfortune?...Why can't they sit back and admire the beauty of god's portrait.. so wonderful so serene..
...In a short while...even the tinniest rays of the sun faded away..as if somebody had covered that canvass of god with a dark grayish black cloth..once it was all dark I came inside..and just then it occurred to me that...

"yes darkness does eat away light everyday..but even if we shut our eyes to it..it will still happen that way..nothing is going to change... and its this darkness, that we all our so scared of..that gives meaning to light..if we notice..even the slightest ray of light shines brightly against a dark background...but the same ray loses its identity when its all bright and illuminated..light emerges out of darkness...day is born out of the night...the end itself is symbolic of a new beginning...these are the hues of life..sometimes dull sometimes bright.. if we don't experience the wrong will we ever know whats right????.."

So let the sun set...if you want a new day to come...and remember the darkest night leads to the brightest day...if we want to salute the rising sun..we need to be strong enough to wave good bye to the setting sun with a smile..in the hope of a better tomorrow!!!

Beginning of a new journey...

Today..I'm all set to enter the big blog world..actually on second thoughts not all that set..honestly a little scared,a little skeptical,and a lot in self doubt..because now I will be shaping my thoughts into words..and those words won't be on the pages of my diary but here..where if I'm lucky people will come and read what I have to say..for all you mind blowing expert bloggers and writers it may not be a big deal at all...but for me it really is...I've spent 21 years of my life...without sharing my inside with anybody...initially nobody cared enough to listen and by the time someone actually did..I had lost the ability to open up..not that I'm complaining..I have beautiful souls around me for which I'm extremely grateful to God..Its just that I don't think what I feel or say is important and honestly I do have a lot of trash filled up inside...which I'm trying to clear up..hope it happens soon...for now I'm making an effort to pour my heart and mind into words..to pen down what I feel..I don't possess..the talent of being able to use dramatic phrases or elaborate language..you see the writing skills are in the process of development..so my expression might be very simple..I have been writing earlier...but except a few poems nothing exactly from beginning to the end..just open lines here and there..in my diary..and blogging was something I couldn't have even dreamt of in my wildest imagination..and today if I have a blog and the courage to write here, its only because of one of my best friend whom I met online on orkut some time ago..to be precise 21st September 2007..He is the sole reason I'm here today...he was the one who thought I could write...he inspired me...gave me the courage to believe in myself..to begin a blog..in fact I din't even know how to make one...he took out the time to make one for me..and gave me the instructions to go about it while we were chatting...and I won't be exaggerating it one bit if I say that I must have asked him hundreds of lame questions..but he was very kind enough to answer them all patiently...Ufff...just look at me...I'm going on and on about him but forgot to disclose his identity only..for me he is stibumama and for the members of the blog world..The Solitary Writer..and now that I have revealed the name I don't think I need to introduce him any further... Best friend...i owe a lot to you...thank you sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo muchhhhhhhhh for encouraging me,inspiring me..giving me the confidence to write,for believing in me...and for all your help,time,patience,support and most importantly for being the wonderful friend that you are...I just don't have words to express my gratitude..Thank you sooooo muchh...I will try my level best to not let you down...and if I can...I wish I make u proud someday...Thanks a ton!This could have just not been possible without you!I'm really blessed to have a friend like you![STATUTORY WARNING:I will be eating a lot of your head in the upcoming days...be prepared..coz you know I'm dumb..] There is another person I need to thank and that is"miss pink orchid"..another awesome blogger...again needs no introduction..Thank you sooooooooo much dear..You haven't even read my works still you joined in..its really encouraging and means a lot to me...I hope I don't disappoint u...thank u soooo much!! I extend a very warm welcome to all those readers who take out their precious time to visit my blog...thank you soooooooooo much in advance I hope my words can bind you if not then at least your feedback will enable me to improve...looking forward to a nice learning and sharing experience. Thank you, God bless.